Global Warming Insanity Has Gone Beyond Satire

I am stupefied!  Fantasy and reality are warped and melded into insanity.  It is now obvious that the Warmist movement will go to any lengths to try to frighten and intimidate the public as their cause goes slowly down the drain.  I can scarcely believe what I have just read in the respected climate blog, climatecentral.org.

Last August, I wrote a satire article for AT, titled  “Global Warming Responsible for Epidemic of Rail Disasters?”.  Although the article was clearly labelled “Satire”, several left-leaning blogs reposted it as fact, including Time-Warner Cable (until they realized it was a joke).  My post was obviously an over-the-top analysis of rail disasters linked to global warming, making fun of the apocalyptic predictions of global warming alarmists:

The devastation that this will cause is incalculable.  Passenger deaths will rise to the millions.  Poisonous fumes from wrecked tank cars will pollute the atmosphere; noxious chemicals will be released into rivers and lakes, destroying the ecosystem.  Flammable liquids will be ignited, causing horrific, out-of-control wildfires.  Finally, critically-needed foodstuffs will not be delivered to their destinations, resulting in mass starvation on a global scale never previously experienced in human history.

To my absolute amazement, Climate Central has published an article almost identical to my satire, “Climate Change Could Warp Rails With ‘Sun Kinks’”. 

When anything goes wrong on the rails, it’s big news even without the help of climate change. Whether it’s a Metro North Railroad passenger train going off the rails in New York City or tanker trains carrying volatile Bakken shale crude oil derailing and exploding, major railroad accidents kill people and destroy property.

Climate change could make moving all those passengers and freight more challenging if it throws a sun kink into the rails.

Actually, I believe my article was much more effectively researched and statistically sound than Climate Central’s.  Based on my synchronicity with the Warmist movement and the timeliness of my insights, I think I deserve to be recognized as a legitimate climate scientist in Al Gore’s army.

The $5 billion government grant I requested in my satire to solve this critical problem using millions of solar-powered fans to cool the tracks still stands.  Based on the current insanity run rampant in our country, if I actually submitted this proposal I think I might actually have a reasonable chance of getting it.  Anyone else willing to get in on the action?

Andrew Thomas     
as published in American Thinker