Scientists Prove Liberalism is a Genetic Disorder

This may be the single most significant medical breakthrough in human history. I want to be the first to congratulate the scientists from Harvard and University of San Diego (rife with appropriate human subjects) who have isolated the “liberal” dopamine receptor gene called DRD4, and nominate them for the Nobel Prize in Medicine and perhaps even the Nobel Peace Prize, as well.

The gene apparently provides a predisposition to this widespread mental disorder, which affects approximately every two in a typical family of five (at least in my case). According to the scientists, this predisposition is triggered into full-blown liberalism by excessive social interaction during adolescence…for example as occurred with the baby-boomers during the era of “Free Love”.

The good news is that a cure is possible! Perhaps a genetic modifier could be introduced as a nasal spray ingested through the lungs, as has been proposed to reverse other genetically-induced diseases such as cystic fibrosis and psychotic narcissism. Can you think of any appropriate subjects for the clinical trials?

Can you foresee a future where people entering polling places are hit in the face with a dose of “sanity spray” prior to voting? I’m certain that a vaccine can soon be developed to insure that our children lead healthy and happy lives, free from illogic, confusion, anger, hypocrisy, and projection.

Imagine a world without “victimized” classes, without special interest organizations having the words “green” or “justice” in their titles, with no demands for entitlements and manufactured “rights”, and where no one thinks we can borrow our way out of debt.

Unfortunately, I can also imagine a massive revolt against any attempt to chemically-alter liberal thought (although chemicals probably contributed to it in the first place). Like brain-dead zombies resisting a psychic therapy that could turn them human again, liberals will probably balk at volunteering to be cured.

Oh, well…I can dream.

Angel aka Andrew Thomas
as published in American Thinker